Why does this journal take so long to issue fresh copy? I can't leave my computer and the Internet for need of consultation with the oracle of Bingham for guidance about how to live my life and what to think of things. – Felicity Undercut
Who's to know?
Why do you keep picking on me? – Anonymous
Huntin seeson purmets?
I goggled the innernet about dear huntin. I don't see where to fill out the huntin purmet form. Where is yur gun catlog? I am ready to start shootin. – Ricko (Reeky) Shay
Let me off this bus.
Where do you get your mailing list? If I am the only one on it, please take me off. – An Anonymous Friend
Stop. Please stop. Please!
What does the publisher think he is doing? Is there no pity? I can't bear to browse the Internet knowing that the hollow sage of TennessseeSoul – the paltry puff of puerilism – is out there ready to pounce with some new diabolical concoction. I am losing sleep in dread of the next publication. – Tendall C. Hightone